Was having a rough
day at work. Yes, I work in the corporate world and things happen.
Friend was accommodating. Waited for me to finish my work, until near 7
PM and then met me for a drink (hey Sonja is right, Yelp app works,
found the wine bar that has a 4.5 star rating nearby Cafe Prague, a
place I wanted to go the last time I passed by with another but didn't
get a chance to check out until now.) Sat by the (fake) fireplace, just
talked and talked. Surprised myself with the ability to forge new
friendship. Because, let's face it, the older you get the harder it is
to make (real, close) friends. For one, you gravitate towards those who
are similar to you, financially, politically, hobbies, interests, way of
life, and way of living. And the older we are, the more we are set in
our own ways. So we tend to become more eccentric/peculiar/unique, or
just plain odd.
Things as small as - "Do you like to travel?" or "Are you conservative?" or "Do you like Indian food?" or "How do you feel about public transportation?" or "What books are you reading?" can really make or break a friendship.
I was, for instance, turned off by someone who did not like Vietnamese food. So I wrote that person off - how could one not love Vietnamese food? Granted he was also very demanding of my time, which let's just say, was unsightly. Don't be texting me every day and get pissy with me because I have not responded. Let's face it, you are not that important. I prioritize according to my level of affection. Com'on, we all do!
So back to my questions above, in my case, yes, no, yes, pro, non-fiction. The last question is the most difficult one because what you read is often a representation of (the current state) you. So friend says "Thinking, Fast and Slow." I was like - "Hmmm. did you read my FB's posting of what I like to read? I read that book like eight months ago." Friend said "No."
OK, I suppose of all the books he picked, he did not say "Mocking Jay, Book 3 of The Hunger Games," which I also happened to read and "liked" at the time, when I went through a phase of teen novels (not proud, but hey, we all regress sometimes.)
I told friend about my impression of book clubs - "bunch of women reading sappy book and one or two lonely men show up trying to get a date." He said, "Oh just women drinking wine." Hmmm... If no men are in those book clubs, perhaps I should join one, if anything, drinking wine sounds good. As long as I don't have to be with bunch of bitter feminists bitching about men. How no one really know how to love them, how they are not appreciated by men, how men are flaky, unreliable, not to be trusted. I had been on that bandwagon once, it's called "Salad Bitch Night," back in late 1990s, in Cow Hollow, in Marina, a bunch of single women in their twenties trash talked about men while eating salad (well, not salad in reality, more like pasta.) But those were Ironmen chicks, they could eat whatever they wanted and still looked willowy. I was the hypocrite, bitch bitch then booty call. Always followed by a booty call. Heck, men were easy to hunt when you were in your twenties.
Now I can be honest (see above about the many attributes about being old.) I like men. Heck, I love men. As long as they don't annoy me.
We promised to exchange the top ten books from each other’s Kindle collection.
I was reminded of another conversation about a month ago when I was going to get a book for someone, I picked up this book called "How to be a man" and then sat it down on the counter, somehow I knew he'd like it but I didn't know if he's already read it. When friend was saying he had learned to cut his hair because he ran out of time and he was reading this book, I blurred it out, "How to be a man" question mark. He said, "Yes." I concluded I know him more than he thought I knew him, or for that matter, more than I thought I knew him.
It's good to know what friends like to read. Either that, or I'm a psychic. I'm not a psychic, by the way, otherwise, I'd predict that I'd have a horrible day at work.
So here is what I think about people. Agree with NYTimes, the older you are the harder it is to make friends - Kathy, I'm right there with you. But on very rare occasions, we meet new people and we grow fond of them and we learn, to our surprise, that we are still capable of making new friends. Granted, the older you are, chances are, those whom you meet, are going to be younger than you, because they have yet to reach the conclusion of "the older you are, the harder it is to make new friends." As long as one person is open to the concept of new friendship, it could still happen. The other, the beneficiary, aka the old dog, can still learn new tricks.
I don't believe in rushing things (I think I should be a wine maker,) I believe in still water runs deep (yes, my 1997 writing theme still stands,) I believe in time. Specifically, the passage of time, and if friends are to be friends, it must stand the test of time.
I look forward to sharing my life with my friends, old, and new.
Things as small as - "Do you like to travel?" or "Are you conservative?" or "Do you like Indian food?" or "How do you feel about public transportation?" or "What books are you reading?" can really make or break a friendship.
I was, for instance, turned off by someone who did not like Vietnamese food. So I wrote that person off - how could one not love Vietnamese food? Granted he was also very demanding of my time, which let's just say, was unsightly. Don't be texting me every day and get pissy with me because I have not responded. Let's face it, you are not that important. I prioritize according to my level of affection. Com'on, we all do!
So back to my questions above, in my case, yes, no, yes, pro, non-fiction. The last question is the most difficult one because what you read is often a representation of (the current state) you. So friend says "Thinking, Fast and Slow." I was like - "Hmmm. did you read my FB's posting of what I like to read? I read that book like eight months ago." Friend said "No."
OK, I suppose of all the books he picked, he did not say "Mocking Jay, Book 3 of The Hunger Games," which I also happened to read and "liked" at the time, when I went through a phase of teen novels (not proud, but hey, we all regress sometimes.)
I told friend about my impression of book clubs - "bunch of women reading sappy book and one or two lonely men show up trying to get a date." He said, "Oh just women drinking wine." Hmmm... If no men are in those book clubs, perhaps I should join one, if anything, drinking wine sounds good. As long as I don't have to be with bunch of bitter feminists bitching about men. How no one really know how to love them, how they are not appreciated by men, how men are flaky, unreliable, not to be trusted. I had been on that bandwagon once, it's called "Salad Bitch Night," back in late 1990s, in Cow Hollow, in Marina, a bunch of single women in their twenties trash talked about men while eating salad (well, not salad in reality, more like pasta.) But those were Ironmen chicks, they could eat whatever they wanted and still looked willowy. I was the hypocrite, bitch bitch then booty call. Always followed by a booty call. Heck, men were easy to hunt when you were in your twenties.
Now I can be honest (see above about the many attributes about being old.) I like men. Heck, I love men. As long as they don't annoy me.
We promised to exchange the top ten books from each other’s Kindle collection.
I was reminded of another conversation about a month ago when I was going to get a book for someone, I picked up this book called "How to be a man" and then sat it down on the counter, somehow I knew he'd like it but I didn't know if he's already read it. When friend was saying he had learned to cut his hair because he ran out of time and he was reading this book, I blurred it out, "How to be a man" question mark. He said, "Yes." I concluded I know him more than he thought I knew him, or for that matter, more than I thought I knew him.
It's good to know what friends like to read. Either that, or I'm a psychic. I'm not a psychic, by the way, otherwise, I'd predict that I'd have a horrible day at work.
So here is what I think about people. Agree with NYTimes, the older you are the harder it is to make friends - Kathy, I'm right there with you. But on very rare occasions, we meet new people and we grow fond of them and we learn, to our surprise, that we are still capable of making new friends. Granted, the older you are, chances are, those whom you meet, are going to be younger than you, because they have yet to reach the conclusion of "the older you are, the harder it is to make new friends." As long as one person is open to the concept of new friendship, it could still happen. The other, the beneficiary, aka the old dog, can still learn new tricks.
I don't believe in rushing things (I think I should be a wine maker,) I believe in still water runs deep (yes, my 1997 writing theme still stands,) I believe in time. Specifically, the passage of time, and if friends are to be friends, it must stand the test of time.
I look forward to sharing my life with my friends, old, and new.
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